In honor of all the Barbies, here is the pinkest and beachiest of all soups – Cherry Gazpacho. You could use Rainier Cherries but you won’t get that PINK BLING of BING. And while a swirl of olive oil is just fine a topping, I found the CRONCH of popcorn salted with Pink Peppercorns to be the perfect piquant accessory.
Step 1. Is your bread as stale as the concept of the ideal feminist? You’re good to go. Otherwise, it’s time to put it in a preheated 350° oven until it is as dry as the ancient husks trying to legislate our reproductive rights. (While we’re here you should give a couple bucks to the Brigid Alliance.)
Step 2. Time to dive into the meditative art of pitting cherries. I use a little paring knife. There’s really no way of hurrying this step up with tools that take up extra room in your drawer…they aren’t really faster and jam up with the pits in infuriating ways.
For this portion of the Cherry Gazpacho recipe, you are here. Present. Your hands are busy. Your mind is empty. You could treat the cherries like rosary or meditation beads. Say a mantra with each one. Try “I am plucking the gender bias out of my world view one stone at a time.” Or “I will cut out the heart of the patriarchy as I am cutting the pits out of these cherries” or, even easier, “Red as a cherry is the color of my rage, hard as a cherry stone is my resolve to pursue a more equal society for all, juicy as summer fruit is a future where women have bodily autonomy, are paid equally for their equal professional labor, and are compensated and appreciated for their emotional labor.” See? Easy. Repeat that until all those cherries are pitted.
Step 3. Are your tomatoes ripe and beautiful? (If you have been following you know how I feel about summer tomatoes…are you in the Tomato Challenge?) To be sure I do not mean beautiful as in perfectly round, red, and ready for a supermarket shelf. I mean PLUMP. Maybe bulbous and dimply. Color doesn’t matter, although these heirloom ones sure made for a pretty color palette on my prep board. The key here is that they’re prime season, ready for action tomatoes. It’s what’s INSIDE that makes these tomatoes beautiful. If you’ve got those cut them up into quarters.

Step 4. Add all the ingredients except the olive oil to your blender. Blend until all of the different flavors exist in the same space at the same time. Ideas and truths can do this too! Women can love pink and heels and feel the crushing pressure of unattainable standards of beauty. Love their children and resent motherhood. Love their career and hate the lie that they could have it all if they work hard enough. Many flavors, one soup…smooth.
Step 5. Slowly add the olive oil while the soup blends. Contemplate what feminist metaphor you can add to this piece of the recipe. Empowerment.
Step 6. ALRIGHT this one is optional. But if you want to treat yourself to the Texture of Luxury, (and MY GOD don’t you DESERVE IT for everything you have done today?) put this soup through a fine mesh sieve before you serve it.
Step 7. Season to taste and serve. Exercise your freedom to accessorize! Pink Popcorn! A little cream! Croutons! A few sprigs of tarragon, or chives. You make YOUR gazpacho beautiful. Express your unique voice through accoutrement.
That’s it. It’s a vegan recipe. It’s unbelievably delicious. It takes about as long as it took you to read this post once you pit those cherries. Well worth it. It will last in the fridge for quite a few days, but the color definitely fades so if this is for a BARBIE PARTY I recommend blending the day of. If you want to make that Barbie Party a fundraiser for Indigenous Women Rising, even better. (Having all the ingredients in the fridge overnight unblended won’t hurt anything, and in fact may help blend all those flavors together.)

Cherry Gazpacho aka Barbie Soup
Equipment
- 1 Blender
Ingredients
- 1 lb Bing Cherries
- 3 Slices Stale Bread Or dry 3 slices of fresh bread, (I like sourdough, french would be great) in the oven at 350 degrees until they are dry. (25-30 mins)
- 1.5 lb Ripe Tomatoes
- 1 Fresh Jalepeño or Cayenne Pepper A fresh mildly hot pepper will do the trick. If you are sensitive to heat, take the seeds out. If you like more heat, absolutely add another jalepeño!
- 1/4 Red Onion
- 1/2 cup Good Olive Oil
- 1 tbsp salt More to taste
Instructions
- Remove all the pits from the cherries
- Add all the ingredients to the blender except the olive oil
- Blend until smooth
- While the blender is running, slowly pour olive oil in
- Pour the soup through a fine mesh strainer for the "texture of luxury"
- Chill well before serving
- Serve with a little olive oil on top, or accessorize accordingly!
I’m not sure what will be more fun – making the soup or reading your instructions. Can’t wait to try this one, especially in this heat!